friends

have u ever think of the friends we have.
we have friends that think of us as their friends as well.
something like a two-way connection.
we also have friends that we think is only there for the sake of something other than friendship.
it is called business.
we also have friends that we think of them as friends, we dream to be their friends, we hope they feel the same way too.
reality is, those "friends" will never be our real friends.
when we want someone to be our friend,
we errored in terms of many spontanious actions,
we speak many things that we don't usually say,
we move like we just learn how to walk,
try to make fun of ourselves,
hope they'll laugh and accept you,
by doing that, you don't make them your friends,
they laugh, yes,
they had fun, probably,
but they think of you as a funny acquaintance, that's the nicest, the worst, as a clown.
This theory doesn't really occur on everyone,
some people are just too cool for everyone,
they never face this kind of things in their social life.
i hope they feel the same,
i hope they know what i want,
i don't need to be that person,
i never say i don't want to,
i'd love to,
but i think being myself is a better decision,
i want to have them,
i need them,
is it business?
i'm not sure,
is it friendship?
i'd like to address it that way.